niedziela, 9 kwietnia 2017

VENDI VIDI AMAVI | MALLORCA DIARY

Dear Mallorca,

If I have to name biggest crush in my life you will be on top of the list ( not including my biggest ever crush - Rudi ). This time was no difference, I don't know what magic you use but I feel like under spell everytime I visit you. There is something beyond in those waves, palm tress and never ending roads all around you. In my heart you have place called as a never ending joy and inspiration comfort zone. Wish to see you everyday and soak in your beautifulness, drinking coffee while watching the waves, laughing with family under palm trees. You are like a wonderland for me, the place that I use to call my second home.

Can't wait to see you once again,
unconditional love,
Your K.

WE CAME, WE SAW, WE LOVED



sobota, 8 kwietnia 2017

WHAT YOU MISSED + CONFESSIONS

You ever been doubting about yourself? Thats what I have been doing for a couple weeks now, I will not make this post sad and despressive because thats not how those weeks were, those weeks were just different. I made come back posts over this blog for like three times in last few weeks why? because I freaking love writing and creating, I love to be here, to be able to speak out loud, to show you my story, my pictures.

During every moment that you see on those photos above I always had back in my head, "not good enough" it's freaking painful and I really hold my tears now to not cry at the front of computer and Rudi when I write this. Don't get me wrong I'm not depressed,or childish I'm not quiting and turining back from my art direction I write this post because maybe now there is a girl like me reading this post and thinking same about herself, maybe she have same thaughts and doubts and this post will not make her feel better but will make her feel not that alone.

The point is that I had to stop to write and create to focus on me and realise where is my problem. I love my life. there are moments when I'm sad or dissapointed with life but in general I love to live and be able to experience but every moment I capture, evey moment I share post or whatever, I feel like not good enough. I'm sitting at the front of my computer or scroll my phone everyday , and I'm just overwhelmed of style, creativity and image of other bloggers or youtubers, O appriciate art in every aspect and creators for their work and style, and for being able to love it enough to share it without doubt and being proud of it, and I'm freaking jealous of those.

I never arrived to point in my work when I loved it so much that I almost blow away, I never reached moment when I just felt myself, when I just said "this is me, this is my style". You can't imagine how painful it is to see your work, three or more years of your life and hating it so much, and putting yourself with other creators and finishing with thought that you are not good enaugh to compare to them.

It cost me a lot to post this and it's really hurt to admit for me but I feel like, if I don't do it I will think this way over and over again and that's not how it should work. I have support in lot's of poeple, people who like what I do, how always have something good to say about me, and I never appriciated or belived in this as much as I should. I'm at point where I'm trying to figure out myself and became more confident. One thing is clear I will never be able to copy anybody, I will never be able to recreate whet others do and what I found out that I love about their work, the thing is I can try to get inspiration from them and try to make it as good as possible, the way I can do and try to reach point when I will be proud of my work and I will try to like it.

Remember what you see in internet, it was alredy created by somebody, and anybody else want to see it recopied we all are looking for new things, your style and you are unique, use it the way you can and show what you have, that's what I'm going to do and hopefuly one day I will write here that I reached my goals.

Love,
K.




wtorek, 4 kwietnia 2017

piątek, 31 marca 2017

SPRING HAS SPRUNG

If I have to choose moment when I realize we finally have spring after the longest winter I ever been through I would choose today, the sun never felt so bright and warm, even tram trip to school felt incredibly adventurous and made me really happy. Spring happiness and brightness really kicked me today, I refreshed all of my old time favourite playlists and artists to find my oldschool "happy songs", even math today felt funny ( believe me or not ), spring pushed me to cut my hair really short today and made me think about summer and traveling more then ever before, spring brought big smile on my face and a lots of engery to my body, this mood brings me back in here after weeks of depresso and lameness with lots of new projects and adventures. Thank you spring to bring happiness, love and warmness while I did not even knew how much I missed you and needed you.

czwartek, 16 marca 2017

MALLORCA JOURNAL + VIDEO


So far most emotional for me and absolutely favourite video. Each of those snippets brings back such good memories and emotions  can't wait to be back. Click above or go to my youtube channel ( click ) to see what I love so much about Mallorca, a little guide and each of my comfort zone corners.

K.







niedziela, 12 marca 2017

RESOLUTIONS


I think it was the longest break I ever took in here over last 4 years but I would lie if I say that it felt bad or was unproductive, because even when I was really far away from blogging and recording I was pretty much busy but mostly I worked on myself and it felt so freaking good!

Those two weeks had been rough and sweet same time, I never had that much time on weekends to just do 'nothing' I really enjoyed every video I watched without thinking that I'm not productive or it have nothing to do with my videos or blog, I also enjoyed my netflix and some series that had stuck on my list 'to watch' and stayed there for way to long, I had more time for my family and being more social and to finally put some resolutions and keep up with them. 

By those two weeks I had enough time to be a bit selfish and think what my body and mind really needs also what makes me even more happy I had time to look around and it really makes me sad to see this mountain of books that is waiting for me since years now to be readed, and it's also sad that I have like thousand  of books about cleaning and minimalism and my room still looks like after war ( also those books made quite mess around too, isn't it crazy that we keep believe that buying books about tidying up will make our space cleaner and fresher when it's absolutely opposite and we are making even more mess while storage them in the corners ?! ) 

I'm not really organise person and I don't put a lot of care for my surrounding and myself in general as much as I should and because last few months was really busy and overwhelming, it makes me feel really doubt about myself and my work, I also struggled with some issues that stuck in my mind and I was not really motivated and inspired to create anything. I think I just needed a break to breathe and relax a bit and it helped me to get back in well shape as much as some resolutions that came on the way and I have to say that it would be nice if I would be more consistent with them and maybe they would become habits and routines.

My resolutions are pretty simple but those small changes make a lot of difference:


| BE MORE ORGANISE AND LESS MESSY
| TRY TO BE MINIMALIST
| DRINK WATER EVERYDAY AT LEAST MORNING AND EVENING
| TRY TO BE VEGETARIAN FOR A MONTH
| TRY TO BE ACTIVE AT LEAST 2 TIMES PER WEEK
| BE CONSISTENT WITH WORK
| TRY YOGA FOR AT LEAST ONE MONTH
| ORGANISE/CLEAN TRASH ON YOUR COMPUTER


Good to be back.
K.



niedziela, 26 lutego 2017

8 | 52 + THINGS THAT MAKES ME HAPPY

If you look now on my computer screen you will see billion of folders waiting to finally be cleaned and segregated, when you look on my phone you will see thousand of pictures I probably don't even like and because weeks are flying so fast and I can't find anything on any of my devices and due to few changes over here and youtube I decided that best summary for last week will be just quick list of things that makes me happy. 

Life by last few weeks and days was really emotional roller coaster and sometimes I just need to seat, breath and say STOP to my brain and remember all the things that makes me so happy and here is just the few of them:

+ Every time I see palm tree or cactus on the street
+ Hours in the car driving around the island
+ My new header on youtube that I made yesterday
+ All the creative plans I have in mind to do while I back home
+ All sweet messages and calls from my parents
+ Feeling breeze of sea on face and sand under feet
+ Going through the polaroid pictures I made
+ Coffee every morning with sun on face
+ Those rainy days on the island
+ Adventures with Rudi
+ Going through places we both don't know
+ Sitting on the stones and look on waves
+ Beautiful colors of nature
+ Finding new pokemons
+ Being called sister for the first time in my life
+ Record every happy and sweet moment
+ Being surrounded by pretty things and laughter
+ Clean space and my productiveness in cleaning closet and computer
+ Looking down to see my converse